A Students Life For Me...

I was studying today (what's new) and my old roommate Jon calls and asks what I'm doing at around 10:50 pm. I said studying... but since it turned out he was in Monterey Park I made him come over and visit me. We played some Smash Brothers without really paying any attention to it and just talked and bullshitted around.

Reminded me of my old college days. It was a welcome break from all these drugs I have to memorize.

Did you know that Romilar is an opiate antitussive (cough medicine) and that Ethanol (Alcohol) functions by potentiating your GABA receptors? Lets hope I can remember this for Friday.

Also.. if any of you guys have some extra time... go on over to Scott's page (see column on your left) and leave him an encouraging word.... he had very very bad day.

Much love Scotty!

In your brain there's this thing called the Hypothalamus which among other things participates in regulating your autonomic system (composed of parasympathetics and sympathetics). The way it does that is through these tracts: the Medial Forebrain Bundle (MFB), the Dorsal Longitudinal Fasciculus (DLF), and the Mammillotegmental Tract (MTegT).

This guy I know came up with a good way to memorize those tracts.

My Fucking Bitch (MFB)
Don't Laugh at her Face (DLF)
cuz she has Massive TiTties (MTegT)

I can't forget those no matter what I do now! What will these kids come up with next?

One thing about myself is that I treat myself exceptionally well when I take finals. It's sort of like my reward for studying so much. For example, these past few days I've been eating whatever the hell I've wanted, pastrami, pizza, chocolate, stuff I would normally be a little more health conscious about. Today I even spent $160 and bought myself a Gamecube, two extra controllers, and Super Smash Brothers.

It serves as a study break for me and whoever I'm studying with.

Hey... if there aren't any rewards then why bother? All that work and all I get is an exam.... theres' gotta be more (and don't say a degree because that's in 4 years and too far down the long). I'm talking about immediate gratification damnit!!!!!

I couldn't watch the Laker game today because of how far behind I was in gross anatomy. But I did watch the live box score (updated every two minutes). I'd look up every few seconds and cheer or cuss with whatever the box score told me. Kind of weird having just a box score elicit such strong emotions... but it's the playoffs... and I guess I don't really even need to watch the games to get excited...

I screamed with joy when the Lakers finally won! GO LAKERS!!!

I couldn't watch the Laker game today because of how behind I was in Gross Anatomy... but I could glance at the live box score (updated every 2 minutes) every once in a while. I'd look up from my studying and start cheering or cussing at what the box told me. Kind of crazy getting crazy at watching a basketball game through a box score and not the actual game itself. I still screamed with joy when the Lakers one! GO LAKERS!!!!

Something funny someone said online...

"My band is called Imation CDR 74m 650 MB....have you seen our CD's ?"

If it's true that "you are what you eat," then today I was a pastrami sandwich, half a gallon of chili-cheese fries, onion rings, thin mint girl scout cookies, and a whole lot of hershey minis. Today was what one would call a splurging-binge-ing day. My fellow med student Gabriel and I spent 26 bucks (well he spent... I owe him) on lunch, which ended up lasting us the entire friggin day.

We got our food from "The Hat," a sandwich stand on the corner of Garfield and Valley. Everyone should get a pastrami dip from there at least once in their lives.

I got a lot of studying done today, basically studied almost 9 hours straight. That's pretty damn insane. More studying tomorrow.

So on top of all those things I was today, we can add Tired, Exhausted, at least 10 pounds fatter, and still very very very Full.

The past few days I've felt like I've been in a rut in my personal life and in my school life. So I thought today was going to be another depressing day. Here was how I planned to spend my Friday evening. I was going to grab some Taco Bell on my way to my MDL (multidisciplinary lab - where my desk at school is) and study the night away. Pretty pathetic.

But then on a whim I called my friend Sabrina up and asked her to watch "Anger Management" with me. So I showed up at the theater and she brought her friend Amy along. And it was a great movie. Perhaps the best movie I've seen in awhile, I didn't even feel pangs of remorse from spending $7.50 for it. It was hilarious... all I can say is definitely GO WATCH IT.

Afterwards we got something to eat in "Garden Cafe," a restaurant that I had never been to before and from there we went to karaoke. I didn't know karoke-ing with three people could be so much fun, but it was.

Sabrina let it all out and yelled and shouted and sang her heart out. She totally nailed that Titanic Celine Dion song (sorry.. can't think of it right now). Amy, who in the beginning of the evening was mortified of singing in front of others and vowed to just "sit and watch," ended the evening by singing "God Must Have Spent A Little More Time On You" and "Yesterday." I had to admit, I was very proud.

So what I planned to be a pathetic evening by myself ended up being a wonderfully fun night with two very pretty girls. Life can be very very good sometimes.

Nam's comment a few entries back (for which she apologizes for trying to steal a piece of my birthday cake) reminded me of something really funny. One thing that I hate to do is share my cheesecake (when I have any). If there is a piece of cheesecake in front of me, I don't care who you are... unless you are prepared to offer me an equal or greater portion of your cheesecake, you won't get any love from me.

On the other hand I don't mind if you share YOUR cheesecake with me! Which I know is a double standard, but that doesn't bother me all that much. I guess I just like "to have my cake and eat it too!"

:)

The Good Life

Last Saturday my friend Eddie came back to Cerritos on leave from his military assignment (for which he is now back in New Jersey). I was hanging out with my friends and discovered what I really wanted at this point in my life. I'm kind of envious of all my friends who're working and are leading what I think is "the good life" for people our age.

Go to work in the morning and make a living. Come home and hang out with friends, watch the game, work on some hobbies. And weekends bring short road trips and what not. None of this crap I'm doing where I attend school during the day, come home and study more school, and when I try to hang out with friends and work on hobbies, I'm feeling guilty about not studying. That is definitely not "the good life."

So Dave Leung, Alvin, Laura, Anthony, Ray, Brian, Ken, all you working people... you have my envy. Enjoy what you got, throw back a beer and toast to "the good life."

If I had two wishes right now.. it would be:

#1 I wish I had cable so I could watch playoffs

#2 I wish I had no exams so I could watch playoffs

and while we're at it...

#3 I wish I had a billion dollars so I could buy the Lakers and watch the play offs and still not give a damn about my exams!

The latest thing I've gotten into is Scrubs the t.v. show. I enjoy it almost as much as I do West Wing (my favorite show of all time). Terrific entertainment.

Things I love: My Pilot Rollingball Pens. When I get into a studying groove.
Things I hate: ...can't think of anything right now.. I'm in a damn good mood!

One thing I've been doing a lot recently is acting like a whiney little bitch (I through a hissy-fit the other day cuz I got pissed off at gross anatomy). I've gotta stop doing that. There are 160 other students in my class having to do the same exact shit that I have to do without getting all whiney. There's no excuse.

Today we met some patients diagnosed with major depression which I discovered is pretty contagious. I actually felt myself slowing down and going into a slump while listening to them talk. On the other side of it, it means that happiness can be contagious too.

This kid would definitely have an easier time getting into Medical school than I had!

HERE

My favorite line of the article is:

"...but that's part of growing up. He didn't lose his idealism, but tempered it with a better sense of reality."

I wish I was a prodigy... then all this pharmacology would be so much easier.

I just have to say that my old roommate Jon is just plain unlucky. I mean there he was doing his dishes and minding his own business when this happens to his car...

HERE

You can't really prepare for something like that. Oh well, at least it wasn't him instead of his car!

For a good laugh... go to THIS site. Trust me. You'll burst with laughter at least once! Thanks to Anthony for showin it to me.

Went to Lisa Sodetani's pot luck for a little bit in Monterey Hills and then rushed to Santa Monica to attend Yen's birthday in my Jon's place. For anyone keeping count, that was my fourth b-day celebration in a week, starting with Anne's last Friday. It was a very fun evening where I got to see all my old college buddies and we got to sit around, watch sports, make fun of each other, and basically shoot the shit. Just like old times.

Our friend Kunal Mehtani came out with a new nickname, "Chemical Mehtani." :) College life was grand.

I think I'm in a very linky mood today.. but I experienced a feel good moment after reading this article which just goes to show that there can be some happy endings to wars and that the U.S. isn't all that bad. Hopefully this will be a sign of things to come in Iraq too.

After seeing previews, I knew that "Malibu's Most Wanted" was not going to be a movie I was going to watch. Reading this review
Basically, I knew it was going to be an idiot movie and I feel kind of bad for this film critic who actually had to sit down and watch that garbage.

So I got this in my email today...

"The Year I Comprehensive Written Examination is scheduled for Friday, June 6, 2003. It will be approximately 5 hours in length and will begin at 8:30 AM in the Mayer Auditorium, Keith Administration Building. This exam will not be available for administration before Friday, June 6, 2003 so please make your travel plans accordingly. There will be no official organized break, so if you complete the exam before the 5-hour time period, you will be free to leave."

That's what I have to look forward to... Great. It's like an MCAT only it's 5 hours intsead of 8.

OK... anyone reading this... please please please go to this site here:

http://home.attbi.com/~bernhard36/honda-ad.html

I promise you won't regret it.

And then after.. you can read more about it here:

http://www.dailytelegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=%2Fnews%2F2003%2F04%2F13%2Fnhonda13.xml

Where they tell you that it was not computer enhanced in anyway, it was all real, among other things..

Today I did something that I haven't done in a while. I got TOO much sleep. Imagine that huh? I slept in this morning... went to class at around 10:30. Came home at around 2 and slept from 3 to 6. And now.. I can't fall back asleep... which means that tomorrow I'll be sleep deprived. And tomorrow is Gross Anatomy day.

Ugh.

Have i mentioned that I hate gross? Tomorrow I think we're sawing our cadavers head in half. The funny thing is that I've never used a hammer and chisel until this year. Prior to this year my only contact with those tools was through what I read, y'know that Michaelangelo used a hammer and chisel to sculpt and other random stuff like that. Now I'm using them weekly to cut through vertebrae and to chisel out the top part of a skull. Pretty gruesome ways to use a tool that I once thought was only used in art.

I had a very interesting dream last night. I dreamt that this girl I knew came on to me. We were making out in the back of a cab which then became a restaurant. We were still making out but this time we were also eating orange chicken, so it involved a lot of smearing and kissing. It felt very erotic in the dream but upon reflection it doesn't seem erotic at all. In fact it seems sticky and messy and very uncomfortable.

I woke up to the sound of banging of the dumpster outside as it was being emptied and when I fell back asleep I was a World War II soldier trying to hide from artillery fire.

11:02 p.m. right now and I just got back from a birthday dinner at PF Chang's in Santa Monica (by 3rd street Promenade). Looks like it's going to be another night if limited studying, just what I need. We celebrated my friend Tim Huang's birthday, his girlfriend Becky with whom I worked with doing research in undergrad organized the whole thing.

It was a fun night and I got to catch up with a bunch of friend from college I haven't seen in a while. Their menu was kind of pricey, but I guess it was just that kind of a restaurant. I paid $12 for a plate of orange chicken (my favorite Panda Express dish) just to see if it tasted any different from Panda's. Well...it certainly didn't taste four times as good (that's the difference in price). I even took a picture of it just to remember how small it was. Next time... Panda Express baby! Authentic chinese food!!!

dunno what happened to the comments.. it seems the site that hosts it has gone temporarily down... hopefully it'll be back soon!

It's been confirmed. I am a certified graduate of AMU (Absent Minded University). For lunch today I went to the school cafeteria and bought a 2 item combo for about 5 dollars. I got a scoop of teriyaki chickien, a scoop of beef and broccoli, and a two scoops of steamed rice. The problem wasn't with the food, but the fact that I had already packed a lunch for myself in the morning. After I finished the food from school I was left with a full stomach and a packed lunch.

I brought the food back and threw it in the fridge, I hope it didn't go bad... we'll find out tomorrow! :)

Tonite we celebrated Vanessa Sun's birthday in a restaurant called "Cafe Santorini." I sat next to Vannita and her wise husband Dave. It was the second time in 3 nights that I sat next to him, which is pretty cool since he's a nice guy. We were trying to figure out whether the restaurant was Italian, Greek, or Mediterannean. Whatevers.. the food was alright.

A bunch of us had an interesting discussion on the act of flirting. Our good friend Yvonne was worried that she appeared "unavailable" and was looking for pointers on how to look otherwise. My advice was to wear spaghetti straps, short skirts, and touch guys a lot (arm brushing and random hugging). Vannita's advice was much more subtle. It involved some form of shoulder shrugging, head cocking, leaning in, and hair flipping. Describing it now doesn't quite do it justice, just watching Vannita pretend revealed that she is a master flirt.

The evening concluded with Jen Hung and Anne Quismorio coming over to study. Instead of blazing through all of our notes we continued the discussion on flirting. Anne's an expert flirt too. Her style involves doling out compliments, raising her voice an octave or so, and peppering it all with intermittent giggling. I guess it would be something like this....

"I like your hair. Heeheehee. You have very nice pants. . You're really smart, I like smart boys. heehee."

She made me blush a little even though she was pretending. Damn.. if you put her and Vannita together... it's over for the male species. Luckily one of them is married and the other is almost. :)

# posted by Selah @ 1:04 AM

"We can't save people from themselves, we just treat them. Smokers, drinkers, druggies, fatties, whatever. All I'm saying is if you keep on living and dying on whether a person changes, well you're not going to make it as a doctor. That's all."

That's a line that really stuck with me after watching an episode of "Scrubs." It's a comedy and all, but this line really caused me to stop and think. I keep wondering how true it is. How many times have you told someone to stop smoking or to eat more vegetables and exercise more? It doesn't even have to come from a doctor. Do they change? Most of the time no.

Ideally a doctor has the ability to change a patient for the better but doctors are people, and so are patients and it isn't very easy to change someone. It's easier to treat them and send them on their way until they come back again.

After playing ball I hurried home and took a shower before going to celebrate a fellow student’s birthday at “The Border Grill” in Paseo Colorado. It was her big “three-oh,” although we were telling everyone that it was her “two-four.” I had steak and spoke to people that I usually don’t have the chance to talk to which always makes for a fine evening.

Afterwards we went to a wine bar next door. A friend of mine said, “this is a typical LA bar,” and he was right. It was filled with chic, hip, smartly dressed, young professionals lounging around sipping wine. I felt a little out of place. The most that could be said about me was that I was young and sipping wine, certainly not chic, hip, or smartly dressed, and definitely not professional (in 10 years I will be damnit!).

I even did something stupid. I bought my birthday friend a beer and brought it to her from the bar along with a glass of ice. A few minutes later someone at our table noticed that the bar tender (a nice looking young lady) kept looking in our direction. We suspected that she was interested in one of us. Well, sure enough she came over to our table and said, “I think you took someone else’s drink while they were in the bathroom.” She was referring to the glass of ice I took which really wasn’t a glass of ice, but a glass of vodka and red-bull and ice. In the end it also meant that she wasn’t really interested in any of us. :(

Yesterday I played basketball for the first time in a few months and I'm still feeling it this very moment. My legs are sore and my back is in desperate need of a massage and a spa.

I want to say first that I've been pretty consistent with swimming and weight lifting, so I thought that I was getting into better shape. I mean I figured, "gee, I swim, and swimming involves kicking and kicking works out the legs so playing basketball should be a breeze now."

I can now tell you that the kicking you do while swimming does not use the same muscles as you use when playing basketball. I have the cramps to prove it.

I'm writing this entry from a computer at home in Cerritos. I came home this weekend and last weekend to pick up some random things, but mostly because I wanted to hang out with my sister. It's actually been a really strange reversal of roles between us. All throughout high school and college it was always her trying to spend time with me and I'd brush her off because I was too busy (or at least I thought I was).

And now, during perhaps the busiest time in my life I'm trying to make time to hang out with her and now she's too busy. It's always SAT classes or group projects or movies with her friends.

I guess the main thing I'm feeling right now is, "How the hell did this happen?"

I have a strange suspicion that this is what parents go through.

Cerumen - the scientific word for ear wax.

And as a side note, here was part of an e-mail my dad sent me:

"I read your web site, how do I enter my response?
Why Laura comments all the time? she likes you?"

too which I now respond....

heh heh...

:)

I'm not sure it was completely noticed, and if it wasn't it was a failure on my part. But I tried to add a tinge of irony to my previous blog entry. I do not agree with, "Do unto others before they do unto you." Terry Pratchett, the author is pacifist and wrote it satirically and I found it both at once funny and appropriate for our current situation.

And another thing to be clear upon, "Dulce et decorum est," is an anti-war poem. The poet, Wilfred Owen fought in World War I and saw how terrible and gruesome things were.

Here is the entire poem:

Dulce Et Decorum Est
by Wilfred Owen
First Published in 1921

Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
Till on the haunting flares we turned out backs,
And towards our distant rest began to trudge.
Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots,
But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame, all blind;
Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots
Of gas-shells dropping softly behind.
Gas! GAS! Quick, boys!--An ecstasy of fumbling
Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time,
But someone still was yelling out and stumbling
And flound'ring like a man in fire or lime.--
Dim through the misty panes and thick green light,
As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.
In all my dreams before my helpless sight
He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.
If in some smothering dreams, you too could pace
Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
His hanging face, like a devil's sick of sin,
If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs
Bitter as the cud
Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues,--
My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To children ardent for some desperate glory,
The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est
Pro patria mori.

I was reading some of my old books before I went to sleep last nite, and I came across a line written by one of my favorite authors, Terry Pratchett, that pretty much summed up the entire reason for the war:

"Do unto others before they do unto you."

I also came across a poem that I had lilked a lot but had long since forgotten. It's title is the same as it's last line, which ends with a tone of irony...

"Dulce et decorum est, Pro patria mori."
(Translation - How sweet it is to die for one's country.)

Things I love: Late night drinks with good friends. Even later night songs at a karaoke lounge with good friends.
Things I hate: Waiting in the post office. Traffic.

My medschool class has an e-mail listserv where people send e-mails to the entire class regarding formation for clubs and lost articles and other random things. Reading the e-mails I recently received it struck me that a lot of my classmates have things that they care very strongly for.

Breast exams, universal healthcare, motivational interviews (ways to get uncooperative patients to do what you want them to do... like stop smoking etc.), sitting in on support groups for familes with members who have discovered that they have cancer - are just some examples.

These are all noble things, and yet I find myself not having very strong feelings towards them at all. I mean, yes, I think it's important that everyone has access to healthcare, women should get breast exams, and that it'd be good for doctors to sit in on those support groups to have a better understanding of the patient's point of view, but I don't feel strongly enough to actually participate. It'd be nice to have a noble and just cause that I could champion. A cause that would get me out there doing something about it and motivate others to follow suit.

Things I love: Spending quality time with friends and family. Buying random things off ebay.
Things I hate: Cleaning bathrooms. Eggplant.

Even though it's a few days too late, here is a site that talks about the top 100 april fools pranks ever!

http://www.museumofhoaxes.com/top100.html

Personally, my favorites are the "Burger King's Left Handed Whopper" and the "Taco Liberty Bell."

Here is a site my old roommate Brian sent me. I met this girl once at a club appearance a few years ago and took a picture with her. You can see it at the bottom of the page of my old site (link is on the left bar). I didn't think it'd be fun reading, but I was wrong... it's actually pretty entertaining. You should also look at the sites of the people who comment on her journal, the females in particular. Not too bad looking at all, if I do say so myself.

Today is back to work day. I goofed off all of yesterday, so I made up for it by studying all afternoon today. I'm going to have to hit the books again in a bit which sucks ass. It takes almost 4 hours to go over one Gross anatomy lecture, and I have 4 more to do after the one I finished this afternoon. Basically I've dedicated from now until Sunday as Gross catch up time.

From noon to about 1 I showed up for my schools acapella group, Chorda Tympani, meeting. We're going to be singing Justin Timberlakes "Cry Me A River" for E-night, which is a med-school talent show sort of thing. It sounds pretty awesome so far, now if only I could read music and not just stand there and ask, "what do I do next and can you do it first so I can copy you?"

Here's a very fascinating article I came across on CNN.com cnn article They actually call the squid a monster in the title, and after reading the article I'm tempted to agree. My favorite line is:

"Its eight arms and two tentacles have up to 25 teeth-like hooks -- deeply rooted into muscle and able to rotate 360 degrees -- as well as the usual suckers to ensure fish do not escape. The hooks not only hold fish for the squid's two parrot-like beaks, but also are used to fend off attacks from hungry sperm whales."

It actually fights off whales. How awesome is that? I'd actually pay money to watch an Ultimate Fighting Championship between this monster squid and a sperm whale.

Before I forget, I just want to put into writing a rule that I have for myself.

"No studying in the 48 hours following an exam."

There, now I feel better for not studying today.... I was just following the rules. Good night.

Watched West Wing and did a back and biceps work out.

Things I love: Chocolate, videogames.
Things I hate: Gross Anatomy, doing laundry.

There's a saying in medicine that goes, "an ounce of prevention is worth 10 pounds of treatment." Basically it means that it's better to do all the little things that keep the big bad thing from happening to you, cuz if it happens you're going to be working that much harder to fix it.

After the exam a bunch of us went ate thai food and went to the Saddle Ranch to celebrate our friend Vannita's birthday. I drank a liter of "Adios Mother Fucker" and another liter of "Long Island Iced Tea" and got piss drunk. Now usually I'm a responsible drinker, which means that between and after alcoholic drinks I down a couple of glasses of water. It's supposed to dilute the alcohol so you don't get a hangover the next morning. Last nite, I neglected my ounce of prevention and subsequently woke up with a nasty hangover. There's nothing like waking up with a headache and the urge to throw up.

But the important thing is that we had a great time! I even rode the mechanical bull!

I just spent the last five and a half hours playing videogames. Dynasty Tactics to be precise. My eyes hurt now. It feels good to play videogames until my eyes are burning, especially when I just finished a big exam and scored an 82% baby.... that's passing with a somewhat healthy margin!

Just now, while I was doing some pre-test studying on my bed I was eating some Hershey mini's, the kind with a foil wrapper, and cut my lip with the edge of the wrapper. The next thing I knew, I looked down and there was blood on my pillow. That's pretty pathetic. What kind of person injures themselves eating chocolate?